I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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