i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's just so happy...and so naked.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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