a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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