Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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