I CAN MOONWALK!
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
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He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
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My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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