wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize