love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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