seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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