the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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