I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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