Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize