PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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