Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize