bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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