butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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