I heard we made out
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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