I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize