Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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