I think I died a long time ago.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize