i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
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And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
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No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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