i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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