Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize