Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for not boning my boss.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
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