just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize