Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
It's official drugs can't kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize