Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Watching her eat just hurts me
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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