so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
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