i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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