So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
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