i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Randomize