Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize