Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize