I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
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Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize