in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a bag of teeth...
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize