Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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