your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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