I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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