i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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