I feel like I'm in dance class right now
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I don't want my vagina anymore.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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