Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
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You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
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He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
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