marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize