On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are my feet made of real feet?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize