i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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