I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Boobs speak an international language.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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