well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Randomize