Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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