My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Redeem this text for a blowjob
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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