Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
