a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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