You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
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